Resilience...

Sometimes people don’t realize how much what they say really takes a hold of others on a certain day in a certain situation. Today, I literally MADE myself go to the gym. I had a horrible trip down memory lane last night and my heart and soul ached and the tears and snot flowed as one. This morning, eyes almost swollen shut I woke up and thought to myself. I can stay here and wallow, or I can get my butt out of the house and do something for me. The person I do the least actually for. So I did. Little bit of cover up under the eyes hid the darkness a bit and hopefully lessened the GOT look. And I went. TRX - we kicked each others butts. But YOGA, the resilience theme meant to speak of muscles really struck home.

Those of us dealing with loss, and heartbreak and the holidays and daily life must be resilient. We must bounce back, albeit to the ‘new normal’ place, not the pre-tragedy place, no matter how, and some days it may be crawling or clawing or baby steps or by whatever means it takes.

In this ‘new normal’ each day you wake up again from a nightmare. The same one over and over again. Each and every day. Well, not me, I actually most nights have real nightmares where Madi is still alive, and then in my dream I realize she’s not, then I wake up and have to go through it all twice. To be quite honest, those days are the worst days ever. Those are the days I create things. Lots of things usually. #whyimakethethings

My resolution for 2019 and beyond is to take better care of me. Physically, mentally and emotionally. I wish the same for you. Remember to take care of you first, because that makes you more able to take care of the ones you love.

Resilience, and letting a few tears roll down your cheeks when they need to, a few fell down mine today and I was thankful for the new hoodie to cover my face in the final rest 🤷🏼‍♀️😉🙏🏼

~Namaste & thanks, Barbara